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Tweets From A Turkey

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“My brother was turkey royalty. When he finally gave up his life, instead of being served to a commoner, he became Thanksgiving dinner for your popular singer Tony Bennett.”

“Just so you know, we do not like it one bit when you use us as a way to describe a bad movie. Stop.”

“You know what’s ironic? Turkeys hate cranberries.”

“We turkeys support the Occupy Wall Street demonstrations. We would love to join in, but most of us will be Occupying Your Ovens, instead.”

“It’s funny you guys have “Black Friday” because turkeys refer to Thanksgiving as “Black Thursday”.”

“Speaking of Black Friday, I’m thinking of taking advantage of the sales and getting me a new laptop.”

The bad economy even affects us turkeys. Do you think it’s easy making ends meet with just a measly residual check from Swanson Frozen Dinners?”

“Why do the Detroit Lions play every Thanksgiving day? Can someone explain that to me? I don’t get it.”







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