Home » pop culture » The Average Joe vs. Celebrities: A (Not So) Thorough, (Not So) Scientific Investigation Into The Difference In The Species

The Average Joe vs. Celebrities: A (Not So) Thorough, (Not So) Scientific Investigation Into The Difference In The Species

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Joe goes to rehab for drinking and drugs.
Celebrities check in for “exhaustion.”

 

Joe’s wife borrows costume jewelry from her Aunt Harriet.
Celebrities borrow million-dollar necklaces from Harry Winston.

 

Joe gets his coffee from the corner deli.
Celebrities have their coffee flown in from some exotic place that’s impossible to pronounce.

 

Joe has Siri.
Celebrities have assistants.
(And the assistants have assistants)

 

Joe spends $500 for 2 tickets to see Springsteen.
Celebrities get free tickets…and go backstage after.

 

Joe can’t afford to get divorced.
Celebrities file for divorce whenever the hell they feel like it…
and don’t even need a reason.
(And usually don’t have one)

 

Joe emails his friends recipes they might like.
Celebrities write cook books. (Even if they don’t cook)

 

Joe takes home video of his family.
Celebrities have cameras following them 24/7 for their reality show.


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