Home » pop culture » Santa’s Long Overdue, Super-Secret Image Makeover For 2012

Santa’s Long Overdue, Super-Secret Image Makeover For 2012

translation services usa






 

Have Rudolph fitted with a new high-tech, laser-shooting nose.

 

Promote my new book, Fifty Shades of Mrs. Claus.

 

Move the toy workshop to China.

 

Then, give in to public pressure and hire
some regular-sized people to make the toys.

 

Get one of those new-fangled hybrid sleds.

 

Shave my beard…for a Gillette Fusion ProGlide Razor ad. (Cha-ching!)

 

Get Lap-Band surgery.

 

Encourage Prancer to finally come out of the reindeer closet.
(What do you expect with a name like Prancer?)

 

Get a tattoo of Mrs. Claus where no one will see it (wink, wink)

 

Encourage kids to use the Naughty or Nice App
instead of writing long, boring letters.

 

Introduce a new character:
Timothy the Polar Bear With A Lazy Eye

 

I’m getting too old for this crap.
What kids will see in the sky this year is a hologram…
meanwhile all the real work will be done by Amazon.

 


Comments are closed.