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Random Friday: Featuring Divorcing Turtles, Bacon Sundaes and More

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Two turtles, Bibi and Poldi, have refused to share the same cage
at the Austrian Zoo after being each other’s companion for 115 years.
They stayed together all these years for the sake
of their turtle kids, now 98 and 95.

 

The Mets are considering having a  ‘quiet’ section in Citi Field…
because most people go to a sporting event for a little quiet time.

 

Burger King has added a Bacon Sundae to their Summer Menu.
In a press release, Republicans say the government should not
get involved in Burger King trying to kill the citizens of our great nation.”
McDonalds is countering the move with burgers dipped in chocolate.
(Actually, those might be good)

 

A new poll (taken by me)  reveals that if Lebron James
brought peace to the world and gave everyone $100,000,
people would still hate him.
However, increase it to $150,000 and suddenly
they love the guy and are buying his jersey.

 

Verizon is changing their phone plans to reflect the fact that
people are using more data and using less talk minutes.
To put that in layman’s terms “The system was no longer working
in their favor money-wise, so they had to change the game.”
 

Just once I would like to call a company for information
and instead of an automated menu giving you the run around
you get a recording that says  
“Because we care about you and don’t want to waste your time
please hang up now because no matter how hard you try
you will never get to talk to a real person.”  

 

If Jerry Sandusky goes to jail, the average age of the guys he “dates”
is going to rise dramatically.
Unless he gets his wish and is sent to juvenile jail.

 

Don’t forget it’s Father’s Day on Sunday…
and it’s easy to forget, especially if you compare it to Mother’s Day.

If Mother’s Day were neon lights…
then Father’s Day is a 30-watt bulb.”



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