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Random Friday

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Congratulations America, you made it a whole week without Oprah! Give yourself a round of applause.

The CIA has a new way of transmitting sensitive information. It’s scrolled on the bottom of the screen during the NHL Finals.

Headline that makes me mad: “Pennsylvania 8th Grade Field Trip Includes Lunch At Hooters.” Why didn’t this happen to me when I was in 8th grade? We only got to go to Hooters for dinner.

If Anthony Weiner’s last name was “Smith” there would be no scandal.

Now that Shaq has retired, he will have a lot of free time. Which is why I am taking up a collection to insure he never makes another movie or rap album.

Groupon was valued this week at about 15-billion-dollars. Man, I’m no mathematician, but that’s a whole lot of people who got $10 off at a Rusty’s Bar and Grill and saved $5 on a manicure.

(Insert your own Anthony Weiner joke here)

Did you watch the spelling bee? I was amazed. Amazed that they could find that many kids who can actually spell real words.

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