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Old Proverbs: Updated For Today’s Economy

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Don’t count your chickens before they’re hatched.
(2011) Don’t count your severance before it’s actually in your bank account.

A little knowledge is a dangerous thing.
(2011) A little knowledge is the only requirement for CEO.

Great minds think alike.
(2011) Great minds are forced to drive cabs
to make ends meet.

Home is where the heart is.
(2011) Home is wherever you live after the foreclosure.

Give someone enough rope and they will hang themselves.
(2011) Give someone who has his life savings in
the stock market enough rope and they will hang themselves.

Honesty is the best policy.
(2011) Honesty is the best policy…for suckers.

If life deals you lemons, make lemonade.
(2011) If life deals you lemons, try and sell them on the corner for 50 cents each.

The early bird catches the worm.
(2011) The early bird catches nothing and neither does the late bird.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
(2011) Having a crappy health insurance plan or none at all keeps the doctor away.


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