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Notes From My Trip To The DMV

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I went to the DMV yesterday and
I’m happy to report nothing has changed.
Not a thing.

1,000 patrons for every employee – CHECK
A majority of patrons who don’t know what the word “patron” means – CHECK
At least one screaming baby – CHECK
No sense of urgency – CHECK

It’s 11am and I’m hoping and praying they get to me
by noon, because I can see them all getting up
in unison and going to lunch.

I’ve noticed it’s very quiet here.
The only thing you hear is the sound of
people mumbling to themselves, myself included.
And the screaming baby.












My number is B-251 and I can guarantee you
right after they take care of B-250 their computers
will go down. That is if they use computers.
Not sure about that.
Maybe I’ll ask if (or when) they get to me.

I try and think of something
positive about this experience.
I can’t.
However, I did kill 15 minutes trying.

While I am writing this I notice
the guy next to me writing, too.
I glance over.
It’s a suicide note.
(With lots of grammatical errors)
I think I may have dreamt this.

Note to self:
Find out if Tom Petty wrote “The Waiting”
while at DMV.

In total I was there for 90 minutes.
The 2 transactions necessary to renew
my license took approximately 3 minutes.

And great news at the end.
My new license is good for 8 years.
8 years.

I walk outside.
The air is particularly refreshing.
The grass is extraordinarily green.
Birds are singing.
(Not sure what, but definitely not “The Waiting.”)
I see a rainbow.
Not a double rainbow, but I’ll take it.


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