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News From Planet Earth…The Laughingstock of the Universe

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ACTUAL HEADLINES/ACTUAL INSANITY (just from the last couple of days)

* click on stories for full articles

Chicago School Bans Homemade Lunch (If you’ve ever eaten food made in school, you know this has be a typo. I’m sure it’s supposed to read “bans  hot lunch made in our roach-infested cafeteria”)

Judge Rules “I Heart Boobies” Bracelets Are OK For Students To Wear (Of course it’s okay. Who doesn’t love boobies?)

TSA Pats Down 6-Year-Old (Apparently the TSA agent thought the “I Heart Boobies” bracelet she was wearing was a potential threat to national security)

For Sale: Stock in the Empire State Building? (I will only invest if they prove to me that the damage created by King Kong has been properly fixed)

MTA Using The Subway To Transport Garbage (If they think their riders are garbage that’s one thing….but to say it to the press…that’s just wrong)

Man Arrested For Creating Fake Army Unit (If anything, I give this guy points for “crime creativity.”)

“World’s First 3D Porn Film” Opens in Hong Kong (Riot ensues as patrons rush the screen)

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