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Celebrity New Year’s Resolutions

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Kim Kardashian:
“Meet and date Katie Perry.”
(Hey, her name starts with a “K”. Plus, think of the ratings)

Katie Perry:
“Stay as far away from Kim Kardashian as possible.”

Newt Gingrich: 
“Stay with my wife, even if she gets cancer. Maybe.”

Tim Tebow: 
“I say it every year, but hopefully in 2012 I will finally find religion.”

Rex Ryan:
“Win the next  Super Bowl…and every Super Bowl after that,
till the end of time”

Justin Bieber:
“Finally give in and get one of those  trendy “Me” haircuts
that all the kids are getting.”

President Obama:
“Find out what it means when people say “Grow a pair!”

Mark Zuckerberg:
“Get more “likes” than ever.”

George Clooney:
“Get more “loves” than ever.”

Herman Cain:
“Get more “(wink-wink)” than ever.”


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